"At the same time he really makes no effort to pursue a relationship with me, but if I dont call or make an effort to see him, he is hurt. I just really want to understand this process and try to give him some type of support.
Thanks - Deborah I too suggest posting this in Friends and Families of Alcoholics.
Ask the person you are dating how he feels about you drinking alcohol.
Discuss with him whether he is comfortable with you drinking in his presence.
Learning how to navigate this disorder and how it affects romantic relationships gives you important tools which can be valuable whether your choose to continue your relationship or not. Alcoholism is a chronic mental health disorder that a person will struggle with for his entire life.